100 Days Quit – 5¢5¢

I’m so glad I found Kill The Can. Though I’m not always terribly active on the discord, the daily check-ins have been a big part of my quit, and early on the website killthecan.org was a godsend with all the information about what to expect at each stage of the journey, and collections of inspirational writing…most notably the Curt Schilling letter to his younger self.

If anybody reads this who is just starting out, or who isn’t sure they’re ready to quit just yet. The toughest part is just deciding to quit in the first place. I’m not saying quitting is easy…it isn’t, but it is still a lot easier than you think it is.

I put off quitting, and instead tapered off of Copenhagen in favor of Zyns for a long time before I actually started my honest to goodness nicotine quit. I kept telling myself “I’m not ready to give it up, I love it too much.”. I knew the shit was bad for me, I’ve known that since before I ever started all those years ago when I was playing legion ball in Wyoming…a place where the umpires promise not to rat you out for dipping underage, as long as they can bum a pinch. But knowing how awful it was didn’t change how daunting it felt to quit. Quitting sounded terrifying, I had heard of all the withdrawal symptoms, I’d had aunts who quit smoking and talked about how they still get cravings all these years later.

It took being forced into going without for a few hours due to a root canal and same day crown procedure to flip that switch in my brain and say “Hey…maybe I can do this.”. Don’t get me wrong, those first few weeks, and those first couple of days especially…can be brutal, but if you’re like me and have internalized how addicted you are, it’s not as bad as you think it will be. There’s going to be some headaches, you’ll have problems with your bowels, which might persist for a couple of weeks, you’ll get insomnia that comes and goes, maybe even for a month. None of that stuff is fun, but you’ve been through all of those things before just by being a human being, it’s nothing new. Your body is healing itself from the continuous streams of stimulants you’ve been feeding it, it’s totally normal.

I could rattle off advice to newbies about little hacks to make your life easier during a quit, but let’s be real, it’s all been covered on KTC before. Get something for your oral fixation early on like gum, find productive distractions to engage in during moments of craving, and of course use your support system. The only ‘hack’ that’s a little unique to me, is I had a new crown on the tooth where I used to keep my Zynners…imagine that, the infected tooth was the one with a foreign object on its gumline 24/7. Having that new crown the first couple of days did certainly help as it felt like something on my gums, which helped curb the oral fixation. I do think meditation is an underrated tool for letting cravings pass…the more you train your mind to treat those thoughts the same way you’d treat random noise in public…ignoring it, the better. If you’re religious, prayer and meditation are essentially synonymous, it’s amazing what prayer can do for your brain too.

There’s going to be a lot of folks telling you that quitting is tough. You’ll hear horror stories of nasty withdrawal symptoms from their quits. Don’t let it affect your decision making though. It’s a couple of rough weeks in exchange for a lifetime of freedom from this self-destructive addiction, improved cardiovascular health, a clearer medical picture and a life worth living those extra years you just bought yourself by quitting. The people telling you the hard part…they’re just being honest and upfront, they don’t want you going in thinking it’s going to be easy. Those folks are correct to do so, if you go into this with a blase, flippant or non-chalant approach, you won’t make it. That’s not commitment. I’m here to deliver a whitepill though…as tough as it can be… it’s probably not as hard as you’re making it out to be in your mind. If you’re on the fence about quitting, like I was for so long, then you’ve hyped quitting up to the level of climbing Mt. Everest. When in reality, it’s more like a 10 mile hike in the rocky mountains. It’s challenging, it’ll get you winded as you acclimate to the environment, but it’s very very doable. You’ve got this!

NOTE: This piece written by 5¢5¢