Over the past few weeks, I’ve seen a lot of negative reaction from you about the type of hard-love given on this site. I completely understand that reaction. We’re adults. New quitters and vets alike. We’re all adults here. Your reaction is usually an emotional one. “I came here because I thought I’d be getting support, not getting screamed at by a bunch of cyber-bully dickheads. Fuck you guys – I’m an adult! I don’t need you berating me!”
And you would be right. You are an adult. And you do not need us screaming at you. But here’s the point you really need to understand – We are not screaming at you, the new quitter. We are screaming at the addict inside of you. You need to recognize – as we do now – that there are two versions of you.
Version 1 is the new quitter who came here with every intention of ridding yourself of this awful affliction we’re all dealing with. This is the version we love and respect. This is the version that receives unyielding support. This is the version that gets “quit with” by supporters on roll-call. This is the version we reply to with phrases like “you got this” and “you’re doing great” and “day x is a tremendous accomplishment – keep it up!”
Then there’s Version 2. We all have this second version of ourselves. This is the version who likes dip – who never wanted to quit dip in the first place. This is the version who wants to finger the nic bitch every chance it gets. And THIS is the version we are all dicks to. We recognize when this version comes around. He (or she) is usually cavalier in his posting. Usually questions the methods we employ on this site. Is usually overwhelmingly arrogant and – at some point – believes “I don’t really need this site anymore.” That version of you wants to go back to nicotine. That version of you is fighting you for control over your addiction. And THAT is the version of you – and of us – that we hate.
This addiction – and our desire to eliminate it – results in a pretty significant internal struggle. This site – and the veteran support found here – is intended to help Version 1 of you defeat Version 2 of you. And yeah, sometimes (most of the times) we have to be dicks about it.