The Endless Loop of Withdraw Comes To An End
I am taking my freedom back thank you very much! Any current nicotine user is in a constant state of withdraw every single day until quit. Talk about slavery and bondage and no freedom.
The endless withdraw loop is as follows, put a dip in, cravings satisfied, nicotine wears off, withdraw symptoms start, put a dip in, cravings satisfied nicotine wears off, withdraw symptoms start.
Do you notice anything here? Well, there are a few things you can take from that but the main point I am trying to make is you are in a constant state of withdraw everyday 15-20 times a day for many years. Repeat that same cycle over and over and over every day, if you are a can a day user like I once was.
When I started my nicotine addiction
I was 15 and one day after football practice. I was new to this school and just met a new friend on the football field.
So, he came over and as I turned on my PlayStation, he broke out a can of long cut Grizzly mint.
He asked if I would like a pinch; I hesitated but took one anyways. I threw up all over my room.
Guess that did not bother me much, I was hooked for twenty-two years from that very day.
My first pause
Fast forward from 15 years old to 30 years old. I decided to try and give this addictive chemical up.
I was starting to have tachycardia issues which is a high resting heart rate above 100. I was between 110-120.
Like running on a treadmill but I was just relaxing on the couch. When I took a pinch out, my heart rate would return to normal and the heart racing would go away.
Soon as I put one in boom would jump way up again. I thought man this can’t be good long term over working your heart.
I was tracking this on a Fitbit watch that tracks your heart rate.
This chemical was slowly killing me.
I had to try over 50 times this year to quit on my own with no success. After trying everything I could think of, I googled “How to quit chewing tobacco”
I came across KTC at the time I believe there was no Discord at the time, just forums and articles of HOF speeches.
I did not make an account I did not get involved I simply had a health scare with my cardiologist and thought I would cold turkey this and read
Every bit of information on this website when the cravings kicked in and chew gum and fake dip. It was the only thing that worked. It got me to over 2 years clean.
The relapse
So, I am now 32 years old at this point I think I am doing good. No more cravings that I can remember. I was to a point I would go weeks and months and not think about it.
I was at my father in laws pool having some beers on a Saturday afternoon I consumed more then I should have.
As my wife was driving us home, I asked her to stop at the gas station. I figured I could just pick up a can and enjoy it as a weekend thing. Wrong!!!!
I was hooked for another 5 years. We are all 5$ and a gas station away from a relapse if we don’t make our promise to our quit brothers and sisters every morning.
So, I continued to use for the next 5 year and I switched to nicotine pouches because I thought it would be healthier because I was starting to have gum issues that turned to gum disease.
Now I have to have deep gum cleanings every 3 months. Not fun.
This is addiction not freedom
I am 37 years old now this makes 22 years of bondage. It is the start of April 2026 The wife and our son are going on a cruise for spring break out of the country.
Before we go, I had to go out and buy 10 cans because I did not want to be without my little crutch in the middle of the ocean for 7 days.
I was starting to get more frequent canker sores all over my mouth that were extremely painful.
It got me thinking how tired I was of having these pop up every week all over my mouth and how sad this is I can’t even go on vacation without buying over 50$ of nicotine pouches to shove in my suitcase.
This is not freedom, this is addiction. It is time to end this once and for all when I get back. So, when I got back from vacation I return to ktc I relapsed after 2 days or so it was not long. I was so embarrassed I left the server without saying bye.
The final quit
So, after relapsing yet again I return to nicotine gum not nicotine pouches and thought let me try and ween down from 160 mg per day of nicotine and see if I can quit this way.
So, I used the nicotine gum for 2-3 weeks. I stumbled across a wonderful book called Allen carrs easy way to quit smoking from a google search and Reddit threads I found.
Everyone was recommending this book how they quit smoking from it. So I thought ill get it and just apply it to dipping.
So, I looked on Amazon and it was 5 stars with all these reviews on how it changed their life and how they quit after reading this book and I thought why not.
Worse comes to worse it’s 10$ wasted but I am willing to trying anything at this point. It arrived on May 19th and
I decided May 20th would be my quit date. I started the book May 20th and had my last dip at 8AM that morning. I read the book and have not used since.
Coming back to KTC
I was so embarrassed of my last attempt of 2 days or so on KTC. I told myself I am not going to even try and return until I prove to myself; I can do this.
After about 40 days, I came back to KTC. I know long term I cannot do this alone. I have tried it that way and failed.
I need God and a promise to my quit brothers and sisters daily for this to stick long term.
Thankful For the support
I’d like to thank everyone at KTC every single one of you are an inspiration to me.
Even ones I have never talked to. Just posting a promise with large number by their name brought me hope this is possible when at times it felt like it was not.
Special thanks to EDT3329 we went out to eat for lunch around my 50 day mark or so and it strengthen my quit more then he even knows truly.
I know he is always a phone call away if I need him. Thanks for everything everyone, nothing but gratitude for the friendships I have made along the way. Proud to be quit with each and one of you!
Goldenlover – August 2026
Quit date 5/20/26
Hof date 8/27/26
NOTE: This piece written by Goldenlover
