Read This One – Dbh68stang HOF Speech

dbh68stang avatardbh68stang avatarThis speech isn’t a victory lap. There won’t ever be a victory lap. I’m not writing this for me. I’m writing it for the person sitting where I was 100 days ago. You can leave the dip in while you read it, but then it comes out. For good.

I started smoking when I was 12 years old. I smoked for the next 26 years until my 2 pack a day habit caught up with me and I had trouble breathing. Did I quit? Please. I did what any reasonable person would do and traded my smoking habit for a dipping habit. I did that for 5 years until I worked my way up to 2+ cans a day. I knew I should quit, but I didn’t feel any particular urgency because I still had time. I’m only 43 years old. My 95 year old grandfather smoked nearly all his life. He finally quit on his 75th birthday. If he could get away with it for that long, why couldn’t I? My 56 year old uncle started dipping and smoking as a teenager and he’s still going. If he could get away with it, why couldn’t I? Back to that in a minute.

I’ll confess that I didn’t necessarily quit just because I was afraid of what it would ultimately do to me. I quit because the habit was exhausting. Gotta find my can. Gotta find a spitter. Gotta find a paper towel for the spitter. Gotta throw out all the old spitters. Gotta peel the label off the bottle I’m spitting in so I don’t mistake it for the one I’m drinking from. Gotta consolidate the half empty cans to see how much I really have. Gotta mix what’s left of the long cut with the wide cut because they were out of the long cut and I don’t like the wide cut as much. Nic wants you to go to the store? You go. Nic wants you to leave the movie early? You leave. Nic wants you to skip the date with your wife so you can stay home and stuff your face? Stay home and stuff your face. Nic wants your vacation money? Fork it over, bitch.

Any of that sound familiar? Sound fun? Sound relaxing? I’m only 100 days removed from it and it sounds pretty stupid to me.

If you’re ready to quit, you’re in the right place. I tried and failed many times before I found this site. You don’t need nicotine gum, or patches, or e-cigs or any of that crap. You may want it…I’m sure you’ll want it…but you don’t need it. All you need is to make a commitment to yourself and to your KTC brothers and sisters. That’s it. You will not believe the freedom that you feel when you finally let go. Quitting sucks, but being a nicotine addict sucks worse. You just can’t see it right now.

I lurked here many times before I got a “get your ass in here” message addressed directly to me. Palpatine, I am very grateful to you for finally getting me off the fence. DWeirick, thank you for guiding me and the rest of the September STDs through the fog. Thanks to my STD brothers PMILS and TheReelMcCoy for saving my roll streak on a couple occasions. 100% for 100 days. That’s how we do it. I approached roll the same way I approached my habit. I damn sure wouldn’t miss a smoke or a dip. I’d drive 100 miles in the middle of the night to buy a can if I had to. You would too. You know you would. You know you have.

I should reserve the biggest thanks for my buddy Rangy96 for telling me about this place 4 years ago and encouraging me to quit. I apologize for using nicotine around you after you quit. I’m truly sorry. You won’t see me put that shit in my mouth again. Ever. Rangy told me something a long time ago that I always remember and wish I had listened to sooner. He said, very simply, “You’re my friend and I don’t want you to die.” That’s what your friends are telling you. That’s what your family is telling you. That’s what your CHILDREN are telling you. Listen to them. You don’t look cool. You look like a dumbass.

What happened to my Grandfather? He passed away last Sunday (day 91 of my quit). He leaves behind his 91 year old wife who is recovering from a broken hip and desperately wanted him to stay around just a little while longer. They had been married for 70 years. Up until very recently he was healthy, active, and enjoying his great-grandchildren. Know what killed him? Lung cancer.

My Uncle? He just finished his treatment for Stage 4 mouth cancer. They pulled all his teeth out. Every damn tooth in his head…pulled out in one sitting. He got home from his last cancer treatment and went to the store to buy Ensure, Jello, and…wait for it…2 cans of Copenhagen. True story.

It might not be today, next year, or even 10 years from now, but it will kill you if you keep it up. Deny it all you want to, but that’s a fact.

I am not cured. I am quit for today. I will wake up tomorrow and I will quit again. I will. Every. Damn. Day. You can too. PM me your number and I will help you. I *want* to help you. Everybody on this site wants to help you. You didn’t come here by accident. You’re here for a reason. Let’s get started.

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member dbh68stang

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One Comment

  1. I’m sitting here with a pounding headache and knots in my stomach because I am tapering off for my quit day (Sept. 30). I am a police officer and I was involved in a fatal shootout in 2011. A year later, PTSD hit me hard and I started dipping. I’ve never smoked a cigarette in my life, but for some reason I turned to nicotine. I got up to almost 2 cans a day before I realized how much control it has over my life. I appreciate you taking the time to write your hall of fame speech! It helped motivate me even more. What you said about not being cured, you are quit for today, and tomorrow you will wake up and quit again….that is exactly what I needed to hear. I’m feeling overwhelmed with looking too far into the future. I’m trying to look at it as I quit for one hour at a time right now. I can’t wait until I can say I quit for the day and it feel as easy as you make it sound.

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