My story of dipping starts about ten years ago. My last week of lifeguarding for the Summer was upon us and my manager needed a day to clean the pool up. So he scheduled all of us and brought tons of energy drinks and a little Skoal can. I remember it was lemon lime pouches. It seemed so innocent, the pouches kept the tobacco in neatly and the lemon lime flavor masked the tobacco all too well. None of the connotations of brown mouth juice, missing teeth, and bad breath came with those pouches. Additionally, I was a swimmer and of course I couldn’t smoke, that would affect my performance. Not dip though, it seemed consequence free.
My first dip went too well, it was basically like getting drunk at work. No nausea or lightheadedness. It just felt good, and so an addict was born.
Over the next 10 years I dipped and smoked my way through college and life. The whole time convincing myself that I would quit at the next milestone. I even quit for a few months a few times on my own. As soon as the cravings left, I forgot about it and just proclaimed myself Tobacco free. It was no longer a problem!! Go me I’m a badass! Well, as soon as I forgot about nicotine, I was defenseless against nicotine, and it always worked its way back into my life.
I got married and started Nursing school. I told myself I would wait till nursing school was over or until my wife was pregnant to quit. Same Ol story.
I even told my family and friends “It’s too hard to quit during nursing school, I can’t put that kind of stress on myself.” Not a damn person disagreed with me. They all told me that was a reasonable plan. They enabled me, and I didn’t want to seek out the truth about my addiction.
Headed into my last semester, I got sick one day and decided to not dip. I made it through the day. So I decided to do it for another day, and then another. I bought a journal to write in. One of the first things I wrote was “I need a plan and a support group, reaching out has always been difficult for me.” I stumbled on this site, and started reading. Nothing but legit advice here and dudes that have been through it. The last 160ish days is history, I’m quit today, and I’m not going to think about tomorrow.
Getting involved is important. You don’t have to dive in and do everything for your quit group. Take baby steps, get some numbers, volunteer for some responsibility, look for a quitter meet up. These are the things that have helped me.
Special thanks to the quitters I was blessed to have met in San Diego: MattyB, Srains, TexasChief, DanoJeno, Leonidas, A-Town, Richard K, and Zquitter