It was 100+ days ago that I wandered into the KTC chat room with a fat dip in my bottom lip looking for a way to quit without the pain. That first day is like many other first days….. I argued with the vets in chat and told them how I was going to quit. I had a quit date planned and everything! That did not go well. I was insulted, made fun of, and told to leave until I was ready to flush that crap. I left chat mad and put in a dip and had a smoke……..who were these total strangers to tell me I could not quit (said the ass who just spit out a dip to have a smoke). That was when I decided to show my critics that I was not a little pussy and I could quit (I did not realize it at the time but I had just decided to change my life). I walked into the bathroom and flushed my can and ran the smokes under water and pitched them too……now I am going back to chat. I expected a warm reception after all I had flushed everything and was now a quitter. That was not what I got. The vets in chat called me names and placed bets on how long I would last. Now I am really pissed, I will show them. Little did I know then, what really happened is that they showed me…..how to quit, how to stand up and just get the shit done one day at a time.
So now here we are at 100+ days. It has been hard but I have made it. It has sucked but I have fought through the suck. The one think I have learned is that I am an addict and the war is never over. 100 days is one hell of a battle won but I must keep fighting every day. The biggest difference between day 1 and day 100 is that at day 100 I have the tools I need to be victorious.
I want to take time to thank a few people. I am sure I will forget someone and for that I am truly sorry. Everyone I have come in contact with here has helped me be a better quitter. For that first day I have to thank Gator and Klark. Klark was the dick who made me want to come back and kick him. Gator walked me through all the details. I think of both of you as friends and thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I also need to shout out to Tarpon17, RedTrain, Copehater, TCOPE, Show, Bradleyguy, SamCat, and every bad ass quitter in March! This place is truly magic and I could not have done it without all of you.
Finally, I want to talk to all the new quitters we have here. This site works guys and gals. It is all about accountability and keeping to your word. Post roll, get and give numbers. Knowing that you have to talk to a bunch of people before you cave will keep you off the shit and true to the word that you give every morning when posting roll. Tough love is what we give here and it works. I know that when I thought about how hard it was to not use I only had to think about how bad it was going to be if I disappointed my quit brothers. It is that accountability and Brotherhood that keeps me quit every day.
So to answer my own question, “100 days WTF do I do now?”. “I quit today”, that’s what the fuck I do now. Just remember, it’s never over but it does get a hell of a lot better!