2010 HOF Speeches

My Bionic Quit

KTC Logo - Red100 days. I knew this day would come. I never had a doubt. It still feels great. I never would have made it without the help I received in here. That and three or four nic lozenges per day.

I’m kidding, Hey! ………….. I’m KIDDING! ……… Don’t get all excited, your Ben-Wa balls are gonna fall out.

A lot has been said on the subject of our hundred days mark. A lot have said it’s just the beginning. A day to be proud of no doubt. It may be the beginning of something, but it damn sure ain’t the beginning of a quit. The beginning of a quit sucks. This day does not suck. This day rules.

I once ruled every day. There was no addiction in my life. I can barely remember what it was like……..I know that it was taken for granted. When I was first handed a can of Skoal Wintergreen Fine Cut, the biggest concern I had was whether or not a few dips would make my teeth yellow. I was so worried that I stuffed that shit in the VERY back of my jaw, so as not to tarnish any visible teeth. As a sophomore in high school , I was about to be in the clutches of UST.

I remember the usage becoming more frequent over the next year or so. I couldn’t wait to drive to the only store in the area that carried the new long cut mint so I could spend my hard earned cash on a new can. As a senior in high school, I took two electives that I didn’t care for just because the coach was the teacher and he let us chew. Five of us in that class shared a spitoon, including the individual who introduced me to that can of Skoal two years earlier. If I cruised over to his house this weekend and shoved a yard full of pine cones up his ass I still don’t think we would be even. All of the original five are quit. By decades, I was the last to quit.

Nevertheless, I am quit now. Yes sir, the nic bitch now slides off me like water off a duck’s balls.

In the course of the last 100 days, my quit has seen some typical stages I refer to as “quitting stones”:

1) The fog
2) I got this shit
3) The fog with some stink on it
4) The “where did I leave my keys” funk
5) Complacency
6) Who kicked me in the jimmy?
7) The fuck-it funk
8) train anticipation
9) bionic quit

I can’t express how much better I feel without the constant harassment of the nic-bitch. We post a lot of examples of situations and times where we would have had a dip in during an activity (i.e……mowing the lawn, washing the hamster, takin’ a shit……..etc.). These are good things to remind us of how we now have control. The things I like to enjoy are the situations where I dont have to have a dip anymore. I can ride on a plane for hours without taking a dip in the airplane shithouse (not cool…… at all). No longer do I have to scrounge through the trash cans at the movie theater so I will have a spitoon (yeah, I’m way too cheap to pay $8.00 for a soda). Two hours. I couldn’t go TWO hours without a dip! I now go half of the day without even thinking about dip. I owe that fact to this site.

I am not “cured”. I know that. I will continue to post roll. I will post a story everytime I realize something else that can be done without a dip in. I will read what others in here write.

5,840 days. That’s how many days I need to make it before feeling invincible. That’s the highest number of days that I have been without nicotine in my life. My first sixteen years.

Well it’ll only be 5,740 days now bitches!

I hear the train pullin’ in to our station. It’s my turn to do a kegstand in the beer cart, so here’s a list of douc…………………I mean people I wish to thank for their assistance over the last 100 days………………

Martin – The first guy I will call if I need assistance. Thank you brother.

MikeA – Our fearless leader

Jason – The anchor man

Piney – for keeping us in line

Pauly – for being Pauly (and our comic relief – in a place that needs it)

All of April’s Dip Schitz for staying quit.

Bryan – thanks for staying quit. Hampton Roads now has two quitters!

Goochy, Doc, Mordy, MarkH, RikD, McPain and the rest of May……….

Veteran support was huge……….Catfish, kdip, blueclaw, coltpax, pista, greg5280, greg40, franpro, TR, samcat, loot, volp, smokey, ready, kd4jet, doc banner, tcope, daniel-san, ……………this list could go on to include EVERY person on here! Quitter or caver, you have all helped me and I will be paying it forward for quite some time.

P.S. I don’t think you posted it on this site, but Dibs I wish you would share the bus ride story over here. That was one of my favorite examples of why I am and always will be quit.

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member neveragain10

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