I remember thinking that a comma was so far away. An almost unreachable goal…. Now that I’m here, I don’t really think it’s all that special. Don’t get me wrong, it’s taken effort to get here…. but it’s just consecutive days of quit. Nothing more nothing less.
In my time here, I’ve made great friendships, I’ve also lost friends. I’ve had my kids move 3 hours away, and I’ve had them move back home. I married the love of my life. I’ve been to funerals and weddings. I’ve been on vacations, outings and everything in between. I’ve had big highs and low lows. I’ve been tempted, many times. But I’ve never had a drop of nicotine. Thats kinda neat…..
I wake up every morning and make a choice. I choose to put my name on the line here at KTC. I’m never here for the drama, the vortexes or any of the other (fun) stuff… I’m here to stay nicotine free for just one more day. Now, the vortexes, the know-it-all new quitters, and the “drama” keep it interesting…. but it’s not why I’m here. I’m here because I’m an addict.
If I didn’t post my promise tomorrow, I know I would still be quit. But I also know that one day, I’ll be tempted to throw it all away. And I know that one day, if my name is on that line, I’ll be strong enough to stay quit. That’s why I’m here… I don’t know when that day will be… I just know I’ll be on roll when it happens.
I’ve watched quitters leave, some make a big scene and type out a manifesto, some slip quietly out the back door. I’ve also seen quitters come back. Some do well, some drift away, others get to start over again…. That sounds horrible to me! When really, all we need to do is wake up and put your promise down and get on with the day. I don’t need anyone to chase me down anymore. I don’t need anyone to make sure I’m on roll. Because after 3 years of posting my promise daily…. it’s totally on me to be here. And it’s mine and everyone else’s job to teach that new quitter how to own his or her addiction.
Post your promise, keep your word. The rest is stuff.
1113 days in a row, with you