Diary of a Quitter – This Site Saved Me

tdk_dpt avatarI owe everything to my wife and this site. If someone were to tell me 100 days ago that I’d be sitting in my favorite recliner without a dip in, writing a HOF speech on a website for addicts, I’d laugh in their face. But here I am. Quit as hell and so damn proud. My wife took me out for dinner tonight to celebrate. By no means am I done… no I’m just getting started, but this day means so much to me at this point in my life. It was momentous if I could even make it a single day Without caving on my way home from work and buying another can of Skoal Rich blend extra pouches. Let alone, 100.

I began dipping with my roommate and friends my sophomore year in college. It started out minimal and my gf at the time (now wife) told me I shouldn’t do it. I would tell her it was just a phase and I only did it with my friends, playing guitar etc… fast forward to graduating college and we move to Florida, I wanted a dog for Christmas. She told me if I quit dip, she’d buy me a dog. Well, here we are 11 years later my dog is about to turn 11 and I JUST quit dip. It’s been 14 years of this. Broken promises and lying to my wife and myself just to satisfy another craving.

I had attempted to quit easily over 100+ times. Each time being the exact same scenario: decide this is my last weekend of dipping, buy a tin of my favorite dip and throw in as much as I can that Sunday with the plan of “quitting” on Monday. I’d flush the rest down the toilet, say a prayer, and wake up the next morning scared as hell because I didn’t have any dip. I couldn’t make it ONE SINGLE DAY without dip. This went on for years and years. I would hide it from my wife because I was ashamed and scared that I felt HOPELESS. That something could have this type of effect on me was crushing. I’ve always seen myself as strong but I was a bitch when staring down nicotine. After having my daughter and crying because I would rock her to sleep with a dip in my lip, I broke down to my wife and asked her for her help… however she could. And that’s when she found this site. It was on July 17th, 2016. I researched it a little and told her I didn’t think this site would be the answer, that I needed some sort of medication to alter my brain…i.e. Make me some sort of zombie. That’s the only thing I could think of that would help, but she asked me to give it a try.

I decided to give it a go and would you freakin know… its is the ONLY thing that allowed me to get past day 1. Then to get past day 2, day 3, 4, 5,6, etc… I’m on day 100 and will keep this site bookmarked for the rest of my life.

I was skeptical at first but I followed the rules and posted every single day. I became more involved in the threads and read about many other awesome guys who would struggle each day just like me. I wasn’t alone as I had thought all these years. There are other people just like me, professionals, good people with an ADDICTION. Accountability and brotherhood helped me tremendously to get to where I am today.
If this guy, who has “quit” countless times in the past can finally do it once and for all, so can you.

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member tdk_dpt

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One Comment

  1. Great job and nice post Justin. Best part about this site is you’re preaching to the choir. Everyone on here has struggled with “Killing the Can. I cant how many times I ‘quit’, sometimes for over a year. But then some lame reason I’d break my promise. One dip turns into two then three, then you’re right back at it. Don’t let your guard down! 100 days is awesome but there’s always something coming up – fishing/hunting, drinking beer, bad day at work, good day at work, reunion with old friends, road trip, in-laws. One day at a time. Congratulations and keep it up!

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