I started dipping when I was twelve behind the bleachers at a high school football game. One of my “friends” had just got a can of skoal and I took a pinch, being my first time I didn’t know what I was supposed to spit out so I ended up swallowing a lot of it which would’ve made most people throw up but I didn’t, I wish I had though because I probably would have never touched the can again. But I kept going back to the can again and again hiding it under my mattress or out in the woods next to my house so my parents wouldn’t find it, but at that point I was only using it about once or twice a week but then I got out of middle school and in high school none of the teachers cared if the students dipped, hell there were even certain teachers would even let me bum it off of them if I ran out and would let me dip in their classrooms. That’s when the fun wore off and the occasional dip turned into an all out all the time addiction.
Fast forward 15 years and I was dipping at least a can a day sometimes upwards of 3 cans a day. My oldest son finished drinking a dr. pepper that I had bought for him earlier and instead of just throwing it out he kept it and started to spit in it, I noticed what he was doing and asked him why, he said I just wanna be like you dad and it brought a tear to my eye because I knew in that moment I wasn’t just hurting myself, I was possibly throwing away the lives of at least one of my four children if not all of them.
That was when I started this journey. 113 days ago I didn’t think this attempt at quitting would be any different than the others I would make it maybe a day or two before I broke down and bought another can. But this quit was different I was pissed off, I’m still pissed off. I’m pissed off at everything every tobacco company stands for, I’m pissed that I wasted 15 years and thousands of dollars on some stuff that’s only goal was to keep me buying more until it eventually killed me. That’s what started to make this quit different than all the last ones but that still wasn’t enough, then I was researching how to get past day 3 when I stumbled upon KTC and I knew instantly that this was what I needed to keep this quit going.
Justinwilcher day 113.