2020 HOF Speeches

Burn Your Boats – Redux

Burn Your Boats

Today is November 22, 2020 and for me the 14th anniversary of the first time I quit using nicotine with the March 2007 Motley Crue.   Unfortunately, after about 9 ½ years I went back to my addiction.  But now I am back on day 147 with the October 2020 Dark Knights!!!

When I quit 14 years ago I was extremely proud of my accomplishment; when I hit the HOF at 100 days I posted a long HOF speech, which is found here:  https://www.killthecan.org/burn-your-boats-eliminate-failure-as-an-option/

I am not going to repeat everything I said back then (you can still read it) but I still believe what I wrote back in 2007; you have to eliminate failure as an option to stay quit and to deal with your addiction.  My problem was in 2016 I forgot the truths I wrote back in 2007 or maybe I just choose to ignore them.

So why am I back here posting day 147 today?  It is because I am a “stupid pickle” (more on this later).  In 2016, I forgot about “Burn Your Boats” and “Eliminating failure as an option” and replaced it with “Occasionally can’t hurt anything”.  “I will just dip or smoke a cigar when I golf” or “I will just dip on this very long drive”.   Well occasionally soon became frequently and frequently soon became constantly; soon I was right were I was in 2007, except this time I knew better and had no excuse; I understood the addiction, I knew what I wrote back in 2007.  I just choose to ignore it and built a new “boat” to retreat from the battle.  I will say I was very ashamed and depressed by my failure.  I was also amazed at how quickly my nicotine addiction took back over my life.

But 147 days ago, I swallowed my pride, stopped beating myself up over my failure and reposted Day 1 and started “Burning Boats Again”.  It was tough, but I quit before so I was confident I could do it again.

The most important thing that I learned through my failure is that I am a nicotine addict for life, but I can still choose to not use the drug anymore stay quit each day.  One of the things I read that really illustrated this well for me was this article: https://www.killthecan.org/stupid-pickles/

I really like the following analogy in this article:

“Now, a Cucumber can always turn into a pickle but a pickle can never go back to being a cucumber.”

Hence, I am a “Stupid Pickle”; it is time for me to accept that fact and deal with it.  There is no more dabbling with nicotine, and I must eliminate failure as an option.

I am very proud to be back posting day 147 today!!!  Would I rather be posting 14 years today?  ABSOLUTELY, but there is no going back.  I can only choose to quit today and look forward.

If you are a “Stupid Pickle” like me looking to quit today YOU can do this!  Quitting forever can seem impossible, but it is very manageable if you take it One Day At A Time (ODAAT) and look at your situation to Eliminate Failure as an Option.

If you are a “Stupid Pickle” that has been quit for a long time, please remember you are still a “Pickle”.  There is no going back to not being an addict.  Stay quit ODAAT.

Virginia Jim

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member Virginia Jim

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