No One Can Do This Alone!

Elizabeth529 avatarIt takes a village to quit!

Hello My KTC quit brothers/sisters:

I wish I never would have taken that first dip that fateful day when I was 21 years old and another female friend said “Here, try this, this stuff is good” in Hickville Punta Gorda, Florida. I was hooked from that point on and became an addict. 21 years later here I was still dipping, the only addiction that I could not find the strength within myself to quit. I had done other drugs in the past and was able to quit all those other drugs accept Nicotine and dip. It was my vice, the only thing that I thought got me through every day, how I coped with depression, stress, anxiety and the daily struggles and challenges of life we all face.

I would like to begin at where I was in life when I started my quit Journey. I had been contemplating quitting for awhile for the reasons that I was terrified of getting oral cancer and having my jaw removed and dying a slow terrible death. I had dipped for 21 years and I was terrified at things I was feeling on my mouth and tongue. The inside of my bottom lip was all tore up, wrinkled and felt like beef jerky. I had a sore on the inside of my lip that would go away and come back, and I was terrified it was Cancer. I had a sore spot on the back of my tongue, my mouth and lip were starting to have spasms. I had just gotten out of a 5 year dysfunctional, co-dependent, abusive and terrible relationship. I was heart-broken and had to start my life over again. I new I needed to change my life in several areas for my mental and physical health including starting to exercise and eat right. I didn’t want to be a slave to the Nic Bitch anymore and sure as hell was terrified I had oral Cancer. I new I had to quit to save my life for myself, my son and my loved ones if I wanted to live. I googled something about quitting smokeless Tobacco and found KTC. I logged into the chat room and my Journey began. Harvest Girl, Rewire and some other quitters were in chat and wouldn’t let up on me until I dumped my can out. I thought I would NEVER be able to do it and quit. With the support I received from Harvest and the original people in chat and the Vets that have been with since day 1 mainly FishFlorida, I found the strength to at least try and quit because I knew I had support. I posted my intro and then said “Screw it”, I’ll never be able to quit. I didn’t believe in myself. I left the site and continued dipping. I logged into my email and found two emails from Cavman83 and Harvest Girl encouraging me to come back and that I had support. I logged back onto the site and found a PM from FishFLorida (my man Dave ) and he said “YOU ARE GOING TO QUIT, IT’S A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH.” So I dumped my can out and started my quit Journey. On day one Fish even told me to call him and he taught me how to post roll over the phone.

Yes, we all know I messed up and Caved about a week into my quit, but realized my F up and came back with a vengeance thanks to all the support I received from Fish and some other people who mean the world to me who I will mention later. This has been a difficult Journey, the first month or so I had so much anxiety and withdrawls I hardly got any sleep. Also the anxiety of freaking out about having oral cancer after dipping for 21 years and how messed up my mouth was didn’t help either.

My March quit brothers know this, but I will share that God blessed me and I was so fortunate that I did not have oral cancer after dipping for 21 years. I went to the oral surgeon had a screening and everything was OK except I have some cavities on my bottom teeth where I used to hold the dip. So my advice for anyone reading this if you are in your first few weeks of quit after dipping for years and you have sores and your mouth feels messed up like mine, don’t freak out, make an appointment with the dentist or an oral surgeon right away for your piece of mind. More than likely you will be OK but you will not be at peace until you get checked. Your mouth and body do some crazy things when you take away the nicotine from your system and it starts healing.

What Have I learned in my quit Journey? I have learned that treating my body with respect and with care is one of the most important things you can do in life. I have learned that I will never put Nuclear Waste and Cyanide in mouth again and continue to kill myself slowly. I have learned that when a group of people come together for a common goal and are supportive of each other through thick and thin, anything is possible. I have learned that NO ONE can do this alone and If it were not for the support I received on KTC, being held accountable and posting roll daily I would have NEVER quit and still be dipping (killing myself slowly). I never even tried to quit after 21 years and I never thought I would be quit this time last year. Most importantly, I’ve learned that I am valuable and my life is worth saving just like every other quitter on KTC.

My Thank You’s!!!!  I have SO many people to thank so if I forget you please don’t take it wrong, you know who you are.

1. FISHFLORIDA (Dave) : I feel I owe my life to FishFlorida (Dave). On day 1 he actually told me to call him and walked me through posting roll over the phone! He has been with me since day 1 and he got me to come back to the site after I posted my intro and left. He has texted me and supported me almost every damn day since I first joined the site. He even still supported me after I caved. He got me through the hardest most agonizing parts of my quit, the first few weeks explaining to me what I was going through and encouraging me to stay quit! Dave, if it were not for you, I would still be dipping. Thank you for helping to save my life! You are an amazing man to give of your time to help new quitters so selflessly!

2. Cavman83: Joel, was also one of the 3 people that emailed me when I posted my intro and left and encouraged me to come back to the site! He has been a support in my quit as well. When I caved holding me accountable and posting “QUIT ALREADY”!! on my Facebook Page.  Thank you Joel for holding me accountable and not giving up on me.

3. Harvestgirl: Harvest has also been with me since day 1, encouraging me my first few days of quit in chat and the first day in chat telling me to dump my can out. Harvest also was one of the 3 that cared enough to email me when I posted my intro and left. Her words of wisdom and support as another honorable woman going through the same struggle of kicking the nic bitch have been so valuable to me. Thank you Harvest!

4. Rewire: I was very blessed and fortunate to have the opportunity to meet Rueben and his beautiful family. It was such an amazing experience meeting you and your family Rueben and I will never forget that. Also a very special thank you for ordering my HOF coin for me. You have also been with me since day 1 in chat and supported me every damn day, always responding within hours when support was needed. You are kind and honorable man and a Bad Ass Quitter!!! I am so proud to know you and be your friend! Thank you Rewire!

5. Candoit (Eric): Eric is another Vet and bad ass quitter that has texted me his day count every damn day since my cave and always had something humorous to say to support me in my quit. He also nicknamed me “Lizard Breath” haha..lol Eric also had so many words of wisdom that I learned so much from. Thank you Eric!

6. Miker0351: Mike is another BAQ who has supported me since my cave and gave me words of encouragement and kept me quit!!! Mike has also texted me every damn day and has had some hilarious quit meme’s that kept me going! Thank you Mike!

7. BiCycleptic (Brian): Brian is another fellow Metallica fan and BAQ who has supported me texting me his day count EDD since my cave! Your support has been much appreciated brother. Thank you Brian!

Of course I need to thank ALL of my March quit brothers!!! Without ya’ll I never would have made it this far. Some of you I have had more interaction with than others but every one of you is just as important! A Special thank you to my March brothers: Kchad, Stewy, Clemte, Wepdoc, Elkslayer, MattO, Goldenbulls, Jeffro, ViceDawg, BigDaddy, and Gentgeen! Thank you Gentgeen for your words of wisdom and always being so kind and positive!

More Vets on this site I would like to give a special thank you too who have supported me along the way are as follows! Cbird65 (Chip) who took the time to speak with me on the phone for 45 minutes at the first week of my quit one day when I was going to cave and talked me off the ledge! I went in chat and called for help and him and NoMore1959 (Henry) cared enough to call me right away! Thank you guys so much for caring and being there for me!!! Dieselchick, Nosnil22, Cmark, EyehateCope (Robby), JB 65, JohnODipp, SirDerek, RichardK, Flippout, FranPro, Siffy, MrLentz, BillDance, WildIrish317 (Was A HUGE help to me when I caved and answering the 3 questions…LOL), Nolaq (Yes, Rush kicks ass!) and Bokie for supporting me in Chat!!!

I know this was long and if I forgot anyone I am truly sorry, you know who you are! Thank you all for helping me to save my life and stay quit EDD!!! Now it is my turn to pay it forward! Another special thank you to our HOF Conductor’s Harvest and Tiswritten! Looking forward to another 100 days with KTC!!!! NAFAR! Honored to quit with all of you EDD!

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member Elizabeth529

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