Just For Today – 100 Days, 1 Day at a Time
My story isn’t much different than anyone else’s. I was young when I started. I knew I was addicted, but always justified it by saying there are worse things to be addicted to. I come from a long line of alcoholics, so I tried to stay vigilant when it came to drinking and drugs. I never wanted to be an addict… Isn’t that something an addict would say?
I loved tobacco. I smoked cigarettes, cigars, chewed and even for a brief time in my teen years used a pipe. Any way I could get that fix I was down for it. I have tried to stop before. I never kept track of how long in any of those stops, but I know not a single one has been 100 days.
I remember my last couple dips… I was sitting on the couch, snuggling with my youngest son and we were watching TV. I moved my son so I could grab a dip and spitter and sit back down. And at that moment, I realized I loved dip more than I loved my sons… That scared me, I fight hard to see them every chance I get. You see, if I loved my son more, I would not have pushed him away so I could put that dead plant in my mouth! Something had to change. After I tucked my kids in for the night I went to have the another dip before bed. It happened to be the last one in the tin. Normally I would have ran to the store to get stocked up before morning, but I made a choice. I made a choice to wait until morning to get that tin. And it is a choice that brings me here today.
The next day, I chose to skip going to the store… I chose to see if I could go all day without a dip! It wasn’t easy, I had a 3 hour car ride to drop my sons off that night and a day surrounded by smokers and chewers. But I did it! And guess what? I woke up the next day and did it again.
About 60 hours in I was searching the internet for the side effects of quitting tobacco. And I stumbled across this site. I started reading and I found the forum, and I signed up. They don’t have a ton of rules around here. You have to be nicotine free and all you have to post roll. I figured why not?. Next thing you know I have these guys calling me out, welcoming me to this brotherhood… What kind of insane asylum did I stumble into? For some reason I came back the next day and told a bunch of strangers I wasn’t going to use nicotine… As time went on, these guys talked about getting digits. I received my first one from RDB and I figured why not. Turns out these crazy people know a thing or two about quitting nicotine, just the answer I was looking for.
Every day I returned and told a pile of strangers I was not going to use nicotine today. Those days continued to add up. I continued to add phone numbers to my phone. Around my day 40 I got to meet Viking, MNx and PMILS. This was an experience that would change my quit. After that, the people I was making my promise to were real. And I was real to them, I couldn’t just turn my back on them and not post my promise today. Around the 80 day mark someone asked me if I was excited for the HoF – The first milestone in this journey. And it hit me like a ton of bricks – I didn’t want to make it to 100 – I didn’t know if I wanted to quit forever… But I have no problem quitting today. Nicotine is still controlling my life. From the moment I wake up, to the moment I post roll it is in charge. Once I post roll, it is no longer an option for the day. And that works for me. I can’t predict what tomorrow will bring, but I feel like I will be back here again posting day 101. I know some people set a bigger goals making it 100, 200 or even 1,000 days. But for me I just want to be quit today. I don’t need to replace one addiction with another, because I am only quitting today.
Bit of advice
- Get involved with your group!! Do the late list, fix roll, help with the SSOA!! On those days that were tough I needed to know others were relying on me. And the bonds you make with the others doing it are incredible. Don’t worry if you are fixing it right, it’s already broken you can’t make it more broken
- Share digits! I have 49 in my phone as of this writing. 2 of them were added today. Text other quitters. Even if it’s only your day count. They become a life-line! And you become theirs!
- Get involved with older groups. I loved to read in February and March to know what was coming down the line. And I have met some of the best quitters by interacting with these groups.
- Get involved with newer groups. Watching new people fight the first week is a reminder of how far you have come. Be the person they look at, so they know it does in fact get better! Give them a heads up as they hit those funks!
- Always be ready for that random out of nowhere crave – be vigilant. I carry mints and fake everywhere I go. I rarely use the fake, but it’s one more layer between my quit and my being a slave.
- Meet other quitters. Find a way!! The nearest quitter to me is over 2 hours away. I have broke bread with 4 quitters now. And it changes the game when you meet them and look them in the eye, shake their hand.
- Find a random quitter and post support for them. Maybe they said something that stuck with you. Because you never know when your Batdad Day XX with… will be the encouragement they need to post another day.
- Make some noise! Don’t be afraid to bump a vortex, don’t be afraid to be the good cop or the bad cop. Rage if you need it, sit back and laugh if that is what you need. Use the site and ALL it has to offer. Be involved any way you can!
- Read, read, and read. This site has humor, random dumb stuff and a rich history. And it is fascinating to look back and realize this system is proven to work for thousands of people!
- Wake up, Piss, Post… Every day. It is the only thing you have control over. And no matter what happens the rest of your day, you can go to sleep knowing you didn’t lose to a dead plant in a can…
- Quit for Yourself! You can’t quit for any other reason. The other reasons help you stay quit, but the only way to get in here and be quit is to want it. There hasn’t been a single cave in here that surprised me. Not because someone is weak, or less of a quitter. It is because they do not want it. They need to be tracked down. They are having issues at home. They already have excuses lined up before the day comes where they post “guys, I screwed up”
- RDB – the first number I ever got. We have texted every day, you always had a way of getting me ready for the next step.
- Njohns23 – your leadership in our group set us all up for a win! You pushed us to become better quitters and you lead by example.
- Viking- Man… What a ride. Your passion for quit is second to none. Proud to quit with you EDD
- Jeff W, Law, Kchad90, Clemte, Justin Robbins, SoccerJack – watching you guys work in and lead in your group is awesome. You guys are the ones I looked up to, good and bad, for how to own this quit! Thank you
- All My April Underdogs!! You all are incredible, awesome, unique people. And when one of us hits a milestone, we all do! I’m not going to list you separate here. Everyone of you has had a great impact on my quit. Thank you!!
- RubyRed, Brett, Leonidas, TankerMate,Ralphie – Your quits strengthen my quit!! Keep pushing!!
- Bicycleptic – one of these days I’m going to catch your posting record!!
- J-Heff- Straight up thank you!! I hope to meet you in person some day!
- Dbh68stang – your humor on your texts is very appreciated!
- FloridaFish, Palpatine, Mrlentz, Roy, ReWire, Miker0351 – Your posts are inspiring!! Your leadership all over this place is appreciated.
- PMILS, MNxEngineer – You guys are like brothers! Meeting you with Viking truly changed the quit game for me!
- Res17cue- Knowing you were there if I ever had a bad call and was looking for an excuse has been so much comfort on more than one occasion.
- There are so many others… I know I am forgetting them and as soon as I hit send, I’ll remember. I am sorry if I didn’t mention you here, just know I appreciate you quitting with me.
To anyone reading this. Know that I want you to be quit today! Yes you!! Be quit today! Shoot me a PM if you want to talk. Shoot me your digits if you would rather text. Even if today is the worst day ever, we can make it without nicotine.
26 years Nicotine has been a part of my life. I don’t know a world without it. I may never know a world without it. But I do know I do not need it today.
Nicotine is not my friend.
I am not cured.
I am also not broken.
I am simply an addict.
I quit today, and will probably be quit tomorrow.
NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member batdad
Outstanding! Well done.